The power of joy is only matched by the power of grief. As humans, I believe that one of our goals is to develop towards a place where we can accept and feel content in the paradoxes of our existence and experience in these bodies. Joy and Grief live simultaneously next to one another. While I am filled with Joy, somewhere nearby someone may be flooded with Grief. And while I am full to the brim with Grief, somewhere nearby someone may be overcome with Joy. It can be extremely challenging not to chase after one and push the other away.
The way I see it is that one of the greatest gifts we are given as humans is the ability to experience a wide array of feelings, experiences, and emotions. We can feel Joy watching someone feel Joy. We can feel our own Grief watching someone else experience grief, and all the while we are having our own experiences of Joy and Grief that others get to witness.
I was reminded of Joy this morning walking to the park with my dog. On the way to the park I looked down on the sidewalk and noticed that someone, probably a child, drew a hopscotch course on the concrete with a rainbow and a slogan to boot. “Hop into Spring” it said at the start of the course and so I did. I began to hop. Right, one...two...Both, three/four...Right, five...six...Both, seven/eight….Right, nine...ten...Both, eleven/twelve...and “Smile” written at the end alongside another rainbow. And, smile I did.
As I walked away I was reminded of something I learned from one of my teachers, which was that if you want to remember our natural state, look to children. Right here on the ground during my walk a child had laid out a path to remember joy in the form of a hopscotch course. The joy I felt at the end of the jumping and hopping was so profound that I did smile. I experienced the childlike reverie of hopping on one foot and then jumping on two and then hopping and then jumping.
In my adult life I needed to relearn how to experience Joy. I am probably not alone in taking myself too seriously as an ‘adult’ or in feeling like I can’t act silly because I’m ‘grown-up’. Carl Jung, the brilliant psychotherapist, set aside time everyday to play in the dirt with sticks and mud so that he could continue to nurture the Joy inside himself. I see Brown Indigenios People of Color BIPOC wisdom reminds us to celebrate Joy, and I remembered this morning that I can take some time everyday to hang out with the child inside me that never left. I never outgrew that child. I just quit listening to the child. I quit allowing them to play in whatever ways they wanted to.
One of the coolest things about children is that, for the most part, they feel things for as long as they need to, and then they move on. They fall down and they cry for as long as they need to. They laugh for as long as they need to, and they seemingly don’t carry too much baggage around. The baggage they carry they get from adults. So, today let yourself feel something fully like a child would. Do something joyful, cry hard, run in a field, rip up some grass and throw it in the air, and see what sense of wonder might overcome you. I know that I was feeling a little down and stuck this morning and, after I let myself play a bit and dance with joy down the sidewalk, everything felt doable. I could feel a sense of ‘ok-ness’ about some sadness I was carrying around. I could feel a sense of beauty in the trees, and the wind on my face made me smile deeply.
I hope you will try it. It might just change your day. - Mom
Best,
Colby
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